130722 12.50

It’s Monday and I was supposed to arrive in Zürich this morning. Left Budapest yesterday 10 past seven in the evening and fell asleep almost immediately.

When writing this I’m on a train to Salzburg and I feel the tube in my arm for the “drip” which they gave me at the hospital and which they today forgot to take out before I left. I guess I was too fast leaving the place. I didn’t know what I was waiting for. Nothing. Wanted to leave that place. 

Tatalánya. A small town in Hungary. Twenty min after the dizziness, the feverish feelings and the pain started the train slowed down and stopped there, Tatalánya. I didn’t know where I was. Could hardly breathe because the pain in my stomach was unbearable. I had to get off the train.

Woke up not more than one hour after leaving Budapest an Á. When I left Bp I was perfectly fine. When I woke up I felt like I needed to move, bathroom. An unpleasant warm feeling swept through my body. Stood up and went to the toilet. The train left Bp not too long ago, so the toilet was still relatively clean. Felt my body temperature rise. Washed my hands and felt like I wanted to throw up. Dizzy and warm. Was I going to faint? Pain started to spread from somewhere from the lower part of my stomach. Why? Was I getting my period? Maybe... I’ll just wait here for a while and recover. I’ll be better in a minute. The thoughts went through my head.

But it didn’t get better, it got worse. Sweating. Cold and warm and I had to sit down. Almost lay down on the train toilet floor. Help me, the words was running through my head… Someone was pulling the door, but I could not even manage to say anything. I was just struggling to fight the pain. Better. No. Worse. Felt like the train was slowing down. The pain was like rays stretching down towards my knees. Should I get off? Do I really need help? Will it maybe get better in a minute? Am I being silly? Hyperventilating. Didn’t want to move, but couldn’t stop moving. Help me.

The train stopped. Fuck. I have to get help. Had no idea when the next stop after this would be. And what if it actually would not get better? Not here. Not now. Why. Stupid life. Hungary. Hope someone speaks English. German. DamnDamnDamn. Managed to open the door. Someone in the way. Sorry, I don’t… feel… Whispering. Pushing the words. Railway conductor. Help. I’m in pain. It does not stop. Help. The conductor looking confused. Help.

They acted fast and an ambulance was on the way. I was shaking and sweating. Help me. The hospital was close. Woman: That’s wrong? Can you tell me? I don’t think they will speak English at the hospital. Pushing the words again. My bag. Had the seat nr written on my hand. Pointed at it. Bag. My bag.

Bench outside, someone came with my bag. The train left. Ambulance personnel came. No. No English. Hardly German.  Pain. Gave them my passport. Shaking. Called Á. Talk to them please. Á is an angel. Her being able to talk to them and translate during this first moments helped me a lot. Stomach, no, not pregnant. No, no allergies. No. Nothing. Have never felt like this before. Still shaking. Now the pain started to come and go in intervals. Breath when you can. In between the sessions of brutal pain. They were going to take blood samples. Started with blood pressure. Fine. My heart. Fine.  Someone in the next room was screaming. Giving away grunting sounds. Hardly human. He was dying. They left me.

The pain came less often. I started to feel that there was something wrong with my face. Stiff. Like swollen. I found my small pocket mirror. Shit. My face had swelled. Could hardly recognize myself. Hah. I laughed. Life. Fun thing. They came back and gave me something to make it better. Nothing happened. Plastic tub in my arm, “Drip”. Slowly parts of my face got better, and at the same time it felt like it spread to my scull and towards my throat. F, my doctor checked on me all the time. “Breath ok?” – Ja.

The nurse spoke little German. We communicated. I am glad I’ve studied German, because I don’t know how I would have managed this trip without it. Bloodsamples. All looked fine. My face and the raches on my shoulders and my arms started to look better. They asked, they thought my face looked fine. Hell no, I could feel that it was still swollen. “Besser, nicht gut. Nicht wie normal.”. My throat was fine though.

Asked for ultrasound. They did. Dr Fogel did the ultrasound. German speaking, totally fluent, probably mother tongue. The “walls” of my bladder was swollen, that’s why. That’s why this happened. Drink. You have to drink more. Water. “Antibiotica Montag. Morgen. Schlafen jetz. Besser Montag, gehen zu Hause Montag.” I stayed the night.

I was in contact with my parents and Á during the whole time. 

At 5 am I woke up. The nurse came again:

-          Besser?

-          Ja, glaube es ist besser.

I didn’t know. I thought it was better. But I didn’t know.

Fell asleep again and woke up when a new patient came and joined me in the room. Fell asleep and woke up when a new nurse poked my back with her stubborn fingertips. Felt like she threw the insurance papers at me and then she left. It was written in some kind of English.

I felt better. I wanted to leave. People came and left. The time passed by. It was 10 and I was fed up with waiting. Went out to find someone to ask. No one. And no one came to collect the insurance paper. Went out again. Herd grunting patients. In pain. Getting better. People talking. Found a nurse. “Was passiert? What am I waiting for?” Heard them talking about the Swede. They came with copies of the documents with test answers and I managed to get them to give me another copy of the insurance paper. Dr F found an English speaking nurse who came and told me where I could find the train station. And the Farmacy. Confusing.

Started to walk. Confused. And asked two nurses on my way to the Farmacy, where is it? No English. No German. I showed them the receipt for the farmacy. “Schwede.” We laughed. One of them went with me to show me the farmacy. Thanks, Kesiseipe.

Farmacy. Trainstation. Food, water. 20 min and I can take the train, one stop to Zürich. Crazy lucky. I managed to get on the train. And even a seat. Hope I will be able to keep it.

That was interesting. The end of my visit to Hungary. And I still have a tube in my arm.

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